Okay, so here's the situation. The primary class we teach is the CTR 8 class (which has the 7 year olds turning 8). In our class there is a girl who confuses me. She can't read anywhere near as well as the other kids, she can't seem to sit still, and she even seems to have self-esteem issues (or at least is VERY reliant on her mom and family still), can't focus on anything, and always gives the most random & non-related answers to questions. Now, I realize that any and all of these things can just be traits kids have sometimes, but who knows. I haven't been told about anything concerning her that would make me believe there is actually some issue like a learning dissability or something, and maybe this is just her, but it seems like there must be something. And I'm not saying that every issue a child has should be told to her teachers, but if there is something going on with her it would be helpful to know, so we could adapt somehow for her if it would help. For now we just have to try our best to not only reach the other kids, but her as well. And often times classes are varied like this, and the teacher simply needs to do her best.
As far as a possible learning dissability, I don't know if she has one, because she seems to be very similar to her mother. Which leads me to another problem. Her mom teaches another primary class (and often has another daughter team teach with her) that sits right in front of ours while we are in the primary room. This girl is constantly getting up and going and standing next to her mom and hugging her or talking to her etc. I want to have her stay in her seat so she does not disrupt anyone else, and to help her stay reverent. Her mother doesn't seem very concerned with this behavior, and doesn't do anything to help encourage her to come back to her seat. Also, her mom doesn't seem to care if she herself is very quiet or courteous of others. Today she (the mom) was talking to a boy in her class who was sitting right next to her, and in so doing (and for quite awhile) was the loudest person in the room, and made it hard for some other kids to listen to sharing time. Am I just crazy in thinking all of this is not okay? Am I wierd to think that kids should listen and be reverent in primary and that the teachers should help them do this?
My problem is what do I do now? Do I talk to the mom about it and risk offending her (since she clearly doesn't have an issue with a little irreverence)? Do I talk to the primary presidency and ask them for advice? Do I do nothing and try to be okay with all the disruptions? I just don't know. I've served in primary for a long long time, have taught many different classes, been in multiple presidencies, and have never seen anything like this. My discription by no means does this situation justice. I would love any suggestions you may have.
I was talking to my mom today after church and told her all of this. I told her I didn't know whether I should be frustrated with parents now a days who don't seem to be able to teach their kids reverence and respect, or if I should be upset at her and my dad for raising me with such high standards which leads me to expect good behavior from people and their kids. And if people tell me it isn't possible, they're wrong. In Emma's entire life we have only had to take her out of sacrament meeting about 10 times, and most of them occured while she was a baby and didn't yet understand reverence (Admittedly, Emma is a really good kid, perhaps largely due to the measures we have taken, but the point is still made). Kids are smart. They learn really quickly (if the parents are willing to teach them) that if they are reverent in sacrament meeting they will have more fun than being noisy and needing to go out into the hall. It's really easy to teach them this, with or without a bunch of things to occupy them. I know I've talked about this issue before, but it still baffles me. But please, if you have any suggestions or ideas about our primary girl, let me know.
Second Week of School
3 years ago
4 comments:
On LDS.org website under serving the church, under primary, there is a section that discusses issues like this and helpful suggestions. It even has some videos you can watch on different scenarios in primary. I'd look at that stuff first.
It is not your responsibility to discipline other's children with no regard to just plain bad behavior to disability related behavior. Your job is to teach the lessons and bring the Spirit. If they are being disruptive to the Spirit in class then they must be referred back to the parents. We aren't babysitters! We're teachers!
I teach sharing time for the Sunbeams and then team teach them as well. We have two children in particular, one more wild than the other, that disrupt class quite a bit. Our Primary presidency has set aside a classroom as the "Quiet" room where we take disruptive children until they are ready to behave. Doesn't work that well with three-year-olds! One child in particular is constantly off his chair, yelling, and all over the room. If you hold him in your arms he wiggles like crazy. Sigh.
The proper steps are not for you personally to approach the parents. I would suggest talking to the primary president about your frustrations and how this child is making it impossible to teach the others and bring the spirit. She should be the one to talk to the mother, since it appears she needs a talking to anyway.
Another thing I would suggest. Prayer and fasting for the child, the family, and yourselves!
I never realized what a difficult calling being a primary worker was...until I was one! But those children as so sweet...when they want to be. Good luck.
It's after midnight, so I'm go to be very brief: talk to the presidency. They always know more than you do, and maybe they'll be able to give you some insights or ideas on where to go from there.
Thanks everyone for your comments. Sometimes it just helps to write something out. I pretty much figured I was going to talk to the presidency. Having been in presidencies before I know what I would do if I were in their shoes, but we'll see what happens.
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